The boss

It's great to hear you're feeling better every day. I think you should cherish your need for control. I am sure that it will work in your favor in the long run. Of course you have to rest, do the chemos, the diet, and all these things you wouldn't want to. But taking some control, within the limits imposed by the situation (yes, those limits are very constraining now), cannot be bad. It will help you motivate yourself, distract you from the things that frighten and depress you, and take a more and more active part in this fight. Besides, both White squadrons on your side and guerrilla fighters on the other had better understand once and for all who is the boss!